Even since birth Gabriella has done this "strange movement" when she is stressed, tired, in a new social situation or excited. It has mostly been a movement only myself and her Father have been able to see. It is also a movement I have always been unable to catch on videotape or have her demonstrate to her physiotherapist although it was described and talked about (when she was seeing a physiotherapist). The "movement" -which I am sure I have described in previous posts, is almost like a jerk like movement while in mid motion (usually running) with her right arm and I am thinking hip. It is like she is running towards point "a" and her right side says umm no lets stop for a second so it pulls her to the right and it catches her off guard and she almost falls.
It seems like this movement had disappeared for quite sometime. In the beginning it manifested itself as her right arm flinging backwards all the time and as an infant she was unable to keep her arms in front and together, with lots of physio this "disappeared." Although we all know it doesn't really disappear; your body just learns how to compensate for the issues.
Recently though it has come back and Mike and I have both noticed. This was confirmed even more so yesterday when a teacher at Gabriella's preschool asked me "Have you ever noticed an issue with Gabriella's balance?" For some reason, my answer was a distant kind of eery yes..it haunts me really.. I don't know why and I can't even explain it. I felt a mixture of emotions 1) YES finally someone has seen her do this! 2) How could I have let this "movement" hang around for so long and so quickly forget she had done it (just because she stopped for a little bit) 3) Guilt
This wonderfully observant teacher was a fill in teacher; I have never met her and I knew she didn't know Gabriella's medical history. Gabi's attends a university preschool which I love and her teachers are amazing and don't get me wrong I am very grateful this person brought this to my attention but I am really perplexed as to my response. It was like an emotional floodgate was opened (although I managed to keep back the tears). I know, it sounds all so mellow dramatic and as I type this I can't help thinking to myself ..wow give me a break, she's doing so well and your worried about an odd movement. It could have been a lot worse. For the last year I was living in a world where I think I actually tricked my mind into believing that Gabriella was not affected at all.. I have no idea why I allowed myself to think this way...she was affected (I am full aware of the fact that was doesn't mean "is gone"). We worked so hard with physio for two years straight ..but all non typical issues melted away and I believed they would never return, our physio found no reason for us to continue seeing her and so I believed all was resolved.
So enough pity party for me; it's time to get back to physio.
My biggest question is how could a "symptom" disappear and then reappear. The damage from the stroke has been done, this is not degenerative. Therefore, I now believe this is caused from a mild form CP-although Gabi has never been diagnosed.
Do these symptoms become more apparent during growth spurts?
If anyone has any experience with "odd postures and movements" that only appear at times of stress I would love to hear from you. I really am interested in knowing what frequency of physiotherapy your child requires or if it's just a strict
regiment of keeping fit in sports so the "weaker" muscles don't dominate??
Thank you in advance to all out there willing to share your experiences :)
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